Thursday, April 21, 2016

The Manifesto of the Pseudo-Etruscan Project

"Pseudo-Etruscan" is a non-feminist political identity which anybody is free to adopt, subject to the conditions set forth below.

An account of the name itself and what it means, would be helpful. Pseudo-Etruscan means simply "false Etruscan'. In order to understand this better, we should discuss what a true Etruscan is - or rather, was.

The Etruscans were a people of ancient Italy who occupied a territory roughly corresponding to modern-day Tuscany, north of Rome. The Etruscans conquered and ruled the Romans for a bit, but finally the Romans turned the table and conquered the Etruscans. After this, the Etruscans disappeared as a people and were lost to history.

The Pseudo-Etruscans are a  people of the 21st century who occupy no particular country and have no necessary connection to the original
Etruscans. It's a fair bet that the average
Pseudo-Etruscan knows diddly-boo about those original Etruscans and couldn't hope to impersonate one credibly, hence the prefix "pseudo".

The name "Pseudo-Etruscan" sounds whimsical and quirky and it might make you laugh. You are certainly welcome to laugh, but you should understand that this is not a joke. At most it is a pseudo-joke; it is nine-tenths serious and serves a serious purpose.
The memorable oddity of the name both draws attention and repels facile interpretation. With any luck it might even activate the "third ear" which can hear the sound of one hand clapping.

Pseudo-Etruscans have some over-arching commonalities. Firstly, they are not feminist. Latterly, they are obstinately individuslist and anti-labellist. "Pseudo-Etruscan" is itself a pseudo-label, and an anti-label, in much the same spirit as " non-feminist". However, it does non-feminist one better, because Etruscans (pseudo or otherwise) have no obvious bearing upon matters at hand. The monikker is pure mental teflon, serio-playfully designed so that things won't stick to it.

Apart from the commonalities, Pseudo-Etruscan men and women don't belong to any group, club, category or collective unless they tell you so out of their own mouths. Under average conditions, no Pseudo-Etruscan is accountable for the words or deeds of any other Pseudo-Etruscan. The only way you can hope to know them, is one at a time. They do not wish to be labelled, so if you label them, the infraction is yours and they will know what to think of you.

Pseudo-Etruscans go where they please, think what they please, break bread with whom they please, and that's the long and short of it. You must not only listen to what they say, but learn precisely what THEY mean by what they say and not what YOU mean by it. You must be mindful of back-story, context, and linguistic convention, and if you misrepresent what they say, the infraction is yours and they will know what to think of you.

You must never tell Pseudo-Etruscans what they think. It is presumptuous to do this. If they feel so inclined, they will tell YOU what they think, and you will listen repeatedly until you get it right.

The Pseudo-Etruscan Project (or "PEP")
asserts the liberty of the non- feminist sector in the most radical way possible. In effect, "Pseudo-Etruscan" is a label with instructions for correct usage attached to it: "Thou shalt not label the one who bears this label."

Certain individuals, when they read this, will feel self-righteously angry and hostile towatd the concepts which are laid out here. Such people are called "bores" and "squares" and "fuddy-duddies", and they shall become the butt of jokes.

If anybody would like to design a nifty, eye-catching Pseudo-Etruscan logo, we are happy to accept submissions. Your payment will be the feeling of satisfaction that you get from the act of contributing. You may send submissions to:

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